The end of the year may be a time for personal reflectch and yada, yada, yada – B.O.R.I.N.G., but tbqh, I plan on changing absolutely nothing about myself in 2015. I shall trod into the New Year with a gargantuan-sized glass of Pinot, accompanied by my partner-in-wine, (according to the Irish Independent) Holly Shortall and together we’ll just keep on being glam and gas, because unlike PINK, we are here for your entertainment.
So, instead of a generic rambling list of personal achievements and future hopes, I am compiling a catalogue of something much deeper and closer to my heart – my top 5 moments in pop culture from the last year – all of which are much significant, so emotion and many personal to me. Enjoy xo.
The Story of Twink and Teddy
I don’t mean to exaj, but this story gripped the nation in 2014 and it has held me in its furry paw ever since. The tale of Adele King and her briefly dognapped Teddy was one of heartache, hope, tenacity, resilience and elation. It was like an episode of Eastenders, except 2,876 times more gripping and emosh. As the country rallied around the panto queen in the aftermath of Teddy’s disappearance, a tip-off led the pooch back into the arms of its doting owner and made icons out of both Twink and Teddy. (As if they weren’t national treasures already, says you!) As the clock strikes 12 tonight, let us all raise a glass to our glitter-clad Queen, Saviour and Ireland’s answer to Joan Collins – Adele King.
My relaysh with Nigella Lawson*
Hope you don’t mind the abbreevs – they just come so natch these days. Relaysh = relationship if you’re confused. Anyway, this year actually saw my obsesh with Nigella receive some reciprocal effort (jeez, Nigella, it takes two), as the self-styled Domestic Goddess, *practically* replied to everything I Tweeted her with a ‘lil DM or public Tweet. Each time, she sent me into a frenzied trance where I’d just scream and hyperventilate until I was told to get a big fat grip. But yeah, I do be living for a bit of #JayGella these days. (*Alright, calm down, I don’t actually think we’re besties, just to be clear).
Cheryl and Nadine – The Fall-Out
(Word of advice: Links are worth clicking on this one, if I do say so myself x)
2014 has not been all plain sailing. Ronan Keating may well call it a roller coaster, but let me tell you, the sea has been just as choppy as it has been smooth. Undoubtedly, the iceberg to my Titanic was the v public spat between my two fave pop princesses of the noughties – my beloved Cheryl Fernandez-Versini and Nadine Coyle. It has had and will continue to have a lasting impact on me. They were the two gals I wanted to be besties the most – y’know, Cheryl over in LA visiting baby Anaya, etc., etc. But, alas, my heart broke when Cheryl blamed Nadine for Girls Aloud’s original hiatus in 2009 and subsequent 2012 split, saying the Derry native was “full of shit”. Then poor Nadine said Girls Aloud still exists, but she’s the only member and then Cheryl unfollowed her on Twitter and ugh, I don’t even know anymore. All I know is that I am bereft. I hope you’re happy, girls. I SAID I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY. Did I deserve? NO. Much sad, very loss.
Tulisa’s X Factor return
Stop the lights. Where do I start with this one?! After a vile couple of years, subjected to a grilling media storm at the hands of – as Twink would say – ferocious opportunists, Tulisa returned to the limelight this summer with a sensaysh comeback performance on XF. Returning to the show as a guest mentor for Louis’ Judges’ Houses segment, Tulisa emerged out of the water in a hauntingly-iconic slow-mo edit and let me tell you this for nothing – this is the way I want to walk into 2015. Tulisa: You are the Chosen One – be wise with your power, my love x.
Kim kropping North out of a selfie
In 2005, Kerry Katona won the much-coveted and sought-after ‘Quality Street Mother of the Year Award’ and if you take a brief look at its illustrious list of winners, you’ll find a notable absentee. If Katie Price could scoop the gong in 2007, then there is absolutely no reason why Kim Kardashian shouldn’t be handed the accolade without contest. Am I wrong? No. I am DEAD RIGHT. In the last few months, she has proved herself to be the most iconic and hilarious mother in pop culture history but it is perhaps her v controversh Instagram pic wherein she crops little Nori out of a mother-daughter selfie that elevates her to levels of narcissism that are so beyond ridicule that they are actually aspirational. Her defence? She was feeling her look and Nori’s eyes were closed. Can she live? Kim, you gas bitch!
Interviewing David Gandy
Yeah, so this is probably the only serious post on the list, but obvs could not leave out – would you? Back in September, David Gandy was in Dublin to launch his underwear collectch for M&S and I was tasked with trying not to descend into a ball of sweat as I sat across from him and asked him questions about his pants. He was pretty much everything you expect David Gandy to be, except 10 times nicer. Of course, when he insisted I have a coffee with him as I was his last interview of the day, I played it v cool by taking A MASSIVE SHLUG of said coffee and burning the roof of my mouth, leading me to start the interview with this question: “David, I’m after scalding the mouth off myself with that coffee, can I get a water or something before we start?” #Thirst
Happy New Year bbz,